The Daddy Daughter Duo

Keeping in Touch over Many Miles

2007-10-28T13:34:00.000-07:00

I've been down in San Diego for a while now and am even more separated from the little one and the folks in BC. When I had a good high speed internet connection, MSN video chat was a great way to see and interact with my little cuty, but now that connection is even more spotty. I've taken to sending videos produced on the webcam home. I can read a book and send video messages. It's not the same, but I think she appreciates them. My wife says she enjoys interacting with videos and is a little sad when they end. So, she must recognise and understand (to an extent) what and who is in the video. It's tough being away like this. I sure miss everyone at home.

Separation

2007-06-09T13:01:00.000-07:00

Ever since the parental leave expired about two months ago the Daddy Daughter Duo has been separated by many miles. It's been difficult being away after being with her 24 hours a day. Work and our living arrangements have conspired to either keep me on the road or to keep her in our second place.

Modern technology has been great, but it is no substitute. I'm glad that I had such a long time with her. I'm more confident now that she will not forget who I am. We see each other about every other week, and she definitely remembers. There was a bit of paranoia on that front for a while.

Anyhow, the little one is quite the monkey now. She is climbing on everything and generally scaring her mother with all of the things she can get herself into and onto. 5 teeth now!

Save our Kids

2007-05-27T22:48:00.001-07:00

A good analysis of some recent rankings. According to Selley the Canadian rankings are the result of a complete change of the criteria used in the rankings. Check it out:

Macleans.ca - Canada - Features | Fact check: Canada's 'plunging' child welfare

Fact check: Canada's 'plunging' child welfare

I've heard the debate before regarding pre-elementary schooling and letting parents raise their children themselves. I'm not sure that the claims of save the children that pre-elementary education is such a great method to insure child-well-being. The traditional parent supervised first five years is what pre-elementary education will naturally be compared to. But of course, such a comparison is problematic. There are such variations in the kind of education that can and is provided by parents. Yet, the principle of cementing parental bonds and building that relationship is far from inconsequential. The utility of a solid foundation between child and primary caregiver is immeasurable. The real question that the ranking wishes to address is the extent to which children have developed and are realising their potential. This can happen in either pre-elementary schools or strong family settings. The focus on the institutional option shows a bias and a political agenda in save the children. It's too bad

Save the Children Press Release at: CNW Telbec

Dandy Daddy Data

2007-03-11T12:48:00.001-07:00

In recognition of my attraction to alliteration I have renamed my link posts "Dandy Daddy Data"

Here are some good Day Care Links:

PacificCARE Child Care Resource and Referral Program - Vancouver Island

This is the child care resource and referral programme on Vancouver Island

BC Ministry of Chrildren and Family Development - Child Care
BC Child Care Subsidy Test

This is a simple online evaluation tool that will help to figure out if you are eligible to receive child care subsidy. There are several different factors in determining eligibility, so it is worth taking a look - it takes 2 minutes.

Some Child Care Blogs I've found (but not necessarily endorse)

Choice for Childcare and Fund The Child (Same Person)
Prairie Voice for Childcare choice

Canadian Child Care Federation - Home

Who's Calling the Shots Now

2007-03-07T13:48:00.001-08:00

There is a scene in the first Jurassic Park film that symbolizes that those crazy raptors are now calling the shots. They are hunting the little boy and girl who have taken refuge in a kitchen and they turn the door knob in order to get in. Those dinos were saying "we're smarter than you think and we now own this place".

Well, today our little one figured out what those raptors figured out. Our lazy baby-proofing strategy (hide it behind a closed door) is about to end. Oh and, if it wasn't clear before, she runs the place.

Technorati Tags: parenting, children, baby, baby proofing

Dandy Daddy Links

2007-03-07T13:38:00.001-08:00

No Child Left Inside - Parents OK

2007-03-04T20:52:00.001-08:00

The Philosopher Dad has a link to a great article about kids and playing outdoors. I think that I had a pretty similar experience to philosopher dad. I had a BMX and a rather large wooded area all around the house where I grew up. I seem to remember riding through woods and exploring the trails unsupervised, discovering all sorts of things and places. The woods seemed huge and interminable - they probably weren't. I learned all sorts of things from raft building to following trails and where to find ant hills.

Since coming to live in a real city I've always worried that the kinds of experiences with the outdoors my children will have will not be nearly as deep, exciting and memorable as the ones that I had. Though there are parks and some very nice green spaces in our neighbourhood they are not as accessible to the kid and her/his bike as the ones that I played in. Moreover there are safety issues regarding very busy streets and letting children play unsupervised in the city. I hope that my daughter has similar opportunities to explore, but I worry that they will be restricted to outings to parks and the country. Though I'm sure such outings would be great - I enjoyed the ones that I took with my parents - I believe there is something to be said about the unsupervised wanderings and discoveries that are made without the watchful gaze of a parent.

The Philosopher Dad: No Child Left Inside

Leave No Child Inside | by Richard Louv | Orion Magazine March-April 2007

Technorati Tags: Parenting, outdoors, recreation, cities, playing

The Day Care Saga

2007-03-02T01:41:00.001-08:00

Last week our daycare provider called and left a message to the effect that the spot that we had booked in October to begin in April was no longer available. So commencing last Friday the Mrs and I have been calling over Nanaimo in order to get a daycare spot a month from now. We managed to find a spot, but not without some panic. At one point we were contemplating a situation where the only place that appeared to have a space was best described as a "death trap" - a dirty, run down house with strange men. Here are some lessons from the front lines:

1. Pacific Care is not the great and wondrous service that some may claim:

When we began looking for day care everyone that we spoke to recommended that we begin with Pacific Care. I have heard nothing but unqualified recommendations for this organisation. It is a good service, but it must be used with a bit of knowledge. The lists that it provides are not in anyway comprehensive and may have geographic boundaries that you are unaware of. We received a list at first and could not find a place. We called back and found out that there were other places that fit our parameters. So we called those places and that is how we found the death trap. It was only when we were looking down the barrel of a world with either no daycare or daycare in a place that we would be afraid to leave our daughter we felt that there must be more places. We found this website. It has more general geographic restrictions and no search side filters.

2. Wait lists are not really very reliable.

Unless you are applying to a large institutional facility, wait lists are not reliable or relied upon. The smaller family child care facilities don't have the resources and time to build and maintain lists. You must call and call back these places and if your plans coincide with theirs you will find a spot. When we called around in October looking for a spot in April we met with two types of responses: "are you crazy of course we don't have a spot, I'll put you on my list but you are at the bottom - good luck" and "Are you crazy? April that is a long way away, I can't plan that far in advance call back in a few months." However, when we were calling this time people could tell us with certainty that they either had a place or didn't. Nobody but one large institutional facility said to me "I have a spot but I have to go through my wait list."

3. If you get a spot leave a deposit

We didn't put a deposit on our first spot. It never occurred to us to do so. We had a reassurance and we had filled out the registration forms so we felt as though it was ours. But, the person we were replacing never left. A deposit is good for both the consumer and the provider. It is a commitment from the consumer not to book two facilities and it forces the provider to insure the space is committed.

4. Just because its licensed doesn't mean its safe

This should really go without saying. There are many things in this world that are licensed, but may not be safe - look at automobile drivers. Check out any daycare and don't be afraid to snoop, poke and prod. Don't be on time - show up a bit early if you have to its better to see a place that has not been prepared for your arrival than one that is on display for your benefit. (Do try to get some information about the place's schedule so you aren't being a nuissance.)

5. Day care providers and consumers see the market differently

On more than one occasion I spoke with providers that were closing down because they said that they had a hard time filling spots. Or they were closing because they didn't think it was worth staying in business. I think this is because there is little price difference among suppliers. The death trap that we visited charged $600/month and the one we settled on charged $640/month. The difference between the facilities was similar to the difference between a Pinto and a Volvo, yet the price difference was negligible. I would have been happy to pay much more money in order to avoid the death trap. I'm not one to encourage providers to charge more, but think a certain stratification of the market would encourage more suppliers.

6. There are places out there

After a lot of time on the phone and searching through lists we did find place and we even had a choice. Our search resulted in three safe places and one death trap that had a spot for us in April and several other places that had spots for us at other times. So, by the end of our search we got to choose our favourite of the three spots. As a result I think we have a better place for our daughter than the day care that cancelled on us.

Its not all doom and gloom out there in the world of day care, but it is a strange market.

Technorati Tags: Day Care, BC, Nanaimo, Parenting,

Wormhole Discovered!

2007-02-13T11:30:00.001-08:00

A new high speed conveyance linking the dining room and the kitchen has been discovered, despite the presence of large bags of rice that had hitherto been hindering its effective use as mode of human transportation.

She's Done It

2007-02-13T11:25:00.001-08:00

After a month or so of intense training in and out of the pool, she's done it. She took two proper steps yesterday - witnessed. The criteria for the little wager has been met. MMMM I can taste something delicious!

We're all very proud over here.

Heads Up

2007-02-11T10:15:00.000-08:00

Inspect cans of baby formula, watchdog warns after tampering found

The Canadian Food Inspection Agency has warned people to inspect cans of powdered infant formula after two cans were found to be tampered with at a Zellers store in Saskatoon.

The cans of half-empty Enfamil brand baby formula were found to have puncture holes, concealed by the label. The agency said it is investigating and will decide whether to do any testing on the cans and their contents.

"Consumers using powdered infant formula products should look under the label to inspect the cans for signs of tampering," said a bulletin issued by the agency on Friday.

Some Links for Dads

2007-01-30T09:53:00.000-08:00

The daddy-baby connection: everyday ways to help them bond - CNN.com
Babble: No TV Before Age Two?
Bornfree!: Milkmen: Fathers Who Breastfeed

The Bet

2007-01-29T19:44:00.000-08:00

Here's the bet that the Mrs and I have. If the little one walks by Valentines day she makes supper, if not I make it.

For the record: in the pool today, she took three steps and was balancing on her own for 10+ seconds.

We Have a Crawling Baby!

2006-11-22T17:03:00.000-08:00

She did it today at about 4:45 and her mom got to see it!! And yes it was "proper crawling". I will be out to the store to get more child proofing supplies this evening. Stand by for pictures.

Parenting Costs and Diapers

2006-11-22T16:52:00.000-08:00

Check out this great post:

Vancouver Dad - Fatherhood in Vancouver, British Columbia

It inspired me to do some number crunching of my own. We try to use cloth diapers as much as possible and so I came up with this crude analysis of the costs. I used my memory of the costs that we shelled out about seven and a half months ago, so the numbers may not be precise, but they are in the ballpark.

I figured that we go through about (on average) 7 diapers a day. We bought equipment for 36 diapers. The numbers extrapolate the cost over 12 months. After 5.5 months or so the initial costs of cloth diapers are recouped as the average cost per diaper decreases over time, though the cost per disposable diaper is constant.

I think that the only variable I haven't accounted for is the power used by the washing and drying of the diapers. (If you were wondering the vinegar is used in the diaper pails... you know... odour).

Of course, one of the best reasons for going cloth is the environment. If you know how I can integrate the cost of the landfill and the pollution from the disposables into this let me know. Until then, shall we say the cost to the environment is incalculable?

Here's the information:

Please let me know what I've missed or if there are better prices that I could have used. The information is easily updated. If there is interest I will post the excel sheet.

Technorati Tags: environment, parenting, parenting costs, diaper costs

No Dads Allowed

2006-11-22T13:13:00.000-08:00

Sigh, this is the time when dad's can really start to bond with their babies and it is an important time to learn about how to care for them.

globeandmail.com: Political correctness gone too far, ADQ Leader says

A Montreal community health clinic has come under fire for excluding men from their neonatal classes to accommodate the sensibilities of Muslim, Sihk and Hindu women.

A tip of the hat to Canadian Cerberus for the link.

Technorati Tags: Parenting, rights, equality, religion, canada,

Starfish Files: Final Lesson and a Waterslide

2006-11-17T14:40:00.000-08:00

Yesterday our little one graduated from the Starfish programme at the Beban Pool in Nanaimo. The final act of courage for your intrepid duo was a trip down the big water slide. To be honest, we (I) had been looking forward to this lesson for quite some time. I love water slides and the chance to take the little one down with me was very exciting. I am proud to say that we went down three times and enjoyed it each time. The instructor was great and encouraged everyone to go - and everyone did. Now we can go find some water-parks (and no, Vancouver doesn't count).

My thoughts on the whole Starfish programme are very positive. Both of the instructors that we had were very friendly and seemed to really enjoy teaching the littlest students. Most importantly it gave me an opportunity to discover what kind of limits and boundaries there are in taking a baby to the pool, and to my surprise those boundaries are further than I expected. So, it gave me confidence to do things in the water and the appreciation that my baby is tougher than I thought.

Photo by Hans Hillewaert. This starfish was sampled on the Belgian Continental Shelf in 2000.

Technorati Tags: Swimming, lessons, swimming lessons, STAHD, parenting, family, Red Cross Preschool, Nanaimo, BC

Staying at Home

2006-11-17T14:25:00.000-08:00

I found a comment on this post at Daddy Dialectic who comments on it here:

Pieces of a Whole » Blog Archive » Stay at home dads

I am saddened by this post for a couple of reasons. If I can assume that this person is a member of the so called "Christian Evangelical Right" then how does this kind of an attitude "focus on the family". I would have thought that anything that would build good strong families would be welcome, especially ones that seem to reinforce the importance of males in the rearing of children. There are some that say that fathers are no longer essential for modern families. Oh well here are some thoughts on the post:

The post sets forth two arguments:

The first is an ideal of strict gender roles that are based on some conception of scriptural hermeneutics apparently from 3 Genesis.
There is a lot to be said against this kind of straight-jacketing. Few
fathers regardless of whether they stay at home or not would accept the
kind of gender roles for their daughters so why should they accept it
for themselves? So, unless you are willing to raise your daughter to
believe that they have one purpose in life that is predefined by her
gender then so might the fathers. But, I think most fathers are willing
to raise their daughters to believe that their daughters can play many
roles in life, and what better way to show that to them than as a
father who too is willing to have many roles.

The second
argument is one that is much easier to agree with: More fathers ought
to spend time with the kids even if that means taking a pay cut. My
problem is that by railing against stay at home dads the post is
removing the one option that might best achieve that aim. Parental
leave taken by fathers is one of the ways many men (including yours
truly) get the opportunity to stay at home. And here is the rub it
often comes with legal protections against job loss and discrimination
- unlike taking a 10% pay cut as the post suggests in order to work
less and play more.

Technorati Tags: Parenting, stay at home dad, fatherhood, family, christian evangilism, focus on the family

Access & Hypocrisy in Nanaimo

2006-11-08T15:45:00.000-08:00

Oh! the hypocrisy. Downtown Nanaimo is one of the most stroller unfriendly places. I went into the Royal Bank at the corner of Commercial and Bastion to use the automated teller. There are three entrances to the bank, all of which have stairs leading to it. There is also a sign that says to use the Commercial street entrance if you want to use the ATM. So, after circumnavigating the large bank I went to the Commercial street entrance where there were three steps a very small landing and a door. Once on the landing with the stroller it was next to impossible to get the door open while remaining on the landing.

Forget all of what I just said, the bank is actually very accessible, there was a handicap automatic door opener - complete with wheelchair icon. In addition there was a handicap icon on the ATM. Don't ask me how someone in a wheelchair could get up to press that button and then get to the teller! The hypocrisy!

Technorati Tags: Access, Handicap access, parenting, Nanaimo, BC, Royal Bank

If you love me you'll buy me this c/o WalMart

2006-11-06T14:17:00.000-08:00

I'm glad that I have a few years before this really becomes an issue. Maybe by then stores will have moved beyond this kind of marketing (unlikely), or maybe I and other parents will have come up with ways of dealing with this kind of nonsense.

Parents shocked at Wal-Mart's online wish list

As retailers begin to roll out holiday season marketing strategies, Wal-Mart has upped the ante with the launch of a new toyland website that encourages children to review a parade of toys presented by two animated elves, Wally and Marty. The retail giant offers 100 options some as pricey as the Fisher-Price Power Wheels Ford Mustang for $249 and children either discard them into a dump truck or send them to a rocket ship to be delivered electronically to their parents when the kids provide their addresses.

There are a couple of issues here. The first is the victimisation of parents by a corporation that is co-opting the love that parents have for their children in order to sell toys. Then there is the value that we put on and ecourage our children to give to toys and other distractions.

The first issue can, I think, be abbeted by showing corporations like wal mart that there wholesale disavowal of any ethical decency in the name of a banner Christmas sales season is revolting and could backfire.

As for a solution to the other issue, I will have to get back on you.

Technorati Tags: WalMart, Christmas, shopping, parents

What to do in Nanaimo?

2006-11-04T11:45:00.000-08:00

With the rainy season upon us (my rain-widget has recorded 7+cm of rain in the last 72hours), what is a new dad in a new town to do? It's pretty hard to get out and stroll about town with all the water coming down and I don't want to become a mall rat. The prospect of hibernation is not very attractive either. hmmm...

Technorati Tags: Nanaimo, BC, Parenting, activities

Starfish Files: Pictures!

2006-10-30T21:12:00.000-08:00

We haven't been to Starfish since last Thrusday, and we are going tomorrow, but the whole family went swimming Sunday and used up just about an entire roll of film in the hopes of getting some good shots. I think we succeeded. I will post more as I get my act in gear, but until then here are some pretty good shots of our little starfish. The picture of the blob beneath the surface is Heidi underwater.

Photo by Hans Hillewaert. This starfish was sampled on the Belgian Continental Shelf in 2000.

Technorati Tags: Swimming, lessons, Starfish, STAHD, Swimming Lessons, Parenting, family, Nanaimo, BC,

Crawling? Who Needs it?

2006-10-24T20:34:00.000-07:00

Who needs to crawl? Heidi sure doesn't. Today she has shown that she can roll most anywhere she needs to go. We've been trying to get her to crawl; she really seems to want to go places, and now she's found a way.

Technorati Tags: Babies, parenting, family, STAHD

The Starfish Files: Underwater

2006-10-24T12:50:00.000-07:00

It was a big day for our little Starfish! We have a new instructor (I am no longer the only man) and he was very keen to get the babies learning some confidence skills by repeating certain movements and sounds - cueing. So, on the count of 1- 2 - 3eeee we would move our starfish sideways through the water. As the babies' confidence increased we were encouraged to move progressivelt deeper through the water. Well, Heidi went all the way under this morning! I think she was the only one to do so. She had absolutely no problem going under, but was a bit confused when she emerged.

I developed the pictures from the last roll of film, but there were no good pictures from the pool, so I have another roll in my camera that should be better in low light conditions. I will try to take lots of pictures in various conditions and maybe one will turn out (Oh! To have a waterproof digital!)

Photo by Hans Hillewaert. This starfish was sampled on the Belgian Continental Shelf in 2000.

Technorati Tags: Swimming, lessons, Starfish, STAHD, Swimming Lessons, Parenting, family, Nanaimo, BC,

Daddy Friendliness

2006-10-24T12:20:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking about starting a running post on places that are accessible for Dads and babies around Nanaimo and Southern Vancouver Island. Of course, I can't check out every place so if any of the throngs of dads who are loyal readers of this humble blog would like to participate, please let me know.

admin (at) chrismaier (dot) net

Technorati Tags: Fathers, Dad, access, Nanaimo, Vancouver Island, babies, parenting